Jalapeno Space Probe

Secretly two months ago, the lab launched a rocket with a Biomechanical jalapeno nose cone filled with small Biomechanicals to probe deep space. Unfortunately, it went off orbit and disappeared. The propulsion unit was found the other day minus the nose cone. Search parties are still looking for it.

TGB Stimulater

An unauthorized photo taken recently at the lab shows Professor Conrad serving as a test dummy for the newly created Stimulator which will be used to waken THE GIANT BRAIN from it's frequent stupors. The test went well and the professor said it was like getting an instant buzz off of seven cups of coffee.

Now required

THE GIANT BRAIN has stated that Dioxahol Lite be drunk by all lab members while on the job. A new intravenous form will soon appear.

Duped

We have been tricked. After the Plutopia party, THE GIANT BRAIN, with help from the rogue Biomechanicals, took over the lab and have made the staff including Professor Conrad virtual prisoners. Since then, we have been outfitting TGB with all sorts of diabolical devices to be used to gain control of all beings living on the surface of the earth. We will be releasing pictures of our work as authorization is  given.  BEHOLD- THE GIANT BRAIN

Dioxahol

Dioxahol and Dioxahol Lite were introduced to the public for the first time at the Plutopia Party on March 15, 2010. All stocks were immediately withdrawn and returned to the Lab for tweaking.

(See disclaimer in a past post)

BEHOLD! The tricked out GB

The newly tricked out GIANT BRAIN and the Jalapeno Space Probe will make an appearance Monday night at the Plutopia Party during SxSW Interactive.

Truce

Professor Conrad has established a truce with the rogue biomechanicals. He was able to do this after hacking into their GIANT BRAIN. Because of this, THE GIANT BRAIN has been brought to the surface and is at the lab. The staff is now making modification to it and it will no longer be totally controlled by the rogues. We hope this peace will last.

EUREKA!

Eureka! I have duplicated my elusive lab experiment in which I created the first bio-mechanical agave. I had been called a charlatan since I could not duplicate it. This time here is photographic proof. I call it Agave mechanicus. It has a mechanical hand which will assist in harvesting it for tequila production.

NIGHT RAVEN RETURNS

The Night Raven has returned and is perched atop the Swamp Strider.

Spider and the Harp

In one of Marcos Caliente's dreams a spider sings and plays a harp.

Marcos Returns

Marcos Caliente has returned to the laboratory to save us from the rogue biomechanicals and corporate destruction of the world!

Lead guitar player found!

Sportsmen, while hunting for Rogue Biomechanicals in the abandoned Lost and Found Mine located on the grounds of Flim Flam Laboratory, found the long missing lead guitarist of the Screamin' Babyheads band. With combined efforts by both the Lab and Flimflam Productions, we hope to get him playing again.

Restoration Complete

The ED WOOD MEMORIAL PERFORMANCE CHAMBER is now open and ready for operation. Historical renovation to the Dioxohol plant has been completed and all toxic material safely disposed of thus allowing the Chamber to be safely used for you music and film needs. Flimflam Productions is now operating the facility.

Performance Chamber

Flimflam Productions has taken the abandoned Flim Flam Laboratory's Dioxihol* plant and is remodeling it into a state of the art Performance Chamber.

(*Dioxihol is the refreshing alcoholic beverage made from toxic industrial and laboratory waste.)

RADIO FLASH 1.0 PISTOL

Announcing the new RADIO FLASH 1.0 PISTOL just released from the Lab. It is a hand held NNEMP (non-nuclear electro-magnetic pulse) device. Each hunter participating in the Annual RBH&R will be provided one to use on the hunt. There are two power settings provide on this model - "stun" and "wipeout". The hunt date is pending.

ANNUAL HUNT APPROACHES

Soon to be announced is Flim Flam Laboratory's annual ROGUE BIOMECHANICAL TROPHY HUNT AND ROUND UP. Sportsmen will be provided with the newly developed RADIO FLASH 1.0 Pistol. No longer will the "Bioms" be blasted to pieces but will be well preserved and ready to be mounted on attractive plaques provided by the Lab. Pictured here are some of the Rogues recently captured that will be released two hours before the hunt. Check back for the Hunt date.

It all went wrong!

After days of tedious work implanting our nano-faux human life forms in carefully grown jalapenos, one of our new techies placed the specimens on a gas grill instead of in the incubator. It all occurred during a lunch break. Jalapenos are now banned from the lunch room and snack bar. Professor Conrad, although devastated, said it could have been worse. They could have been placed in the microwave oven. (Photo via Lori Reed from a Pottery Barn flyer)

Fight Results

It was "The Thing" in 17 minutes over "Computer Face". Mr. Bean will live to referee.

Fight Saturday

Another fight between the Titans occurred outside the Lab in 100 degree heat this weekend. This time the mighty Thing took on Computer Face with Mr. Bean again as referee. The results of that fight will appear in the next posting.

Coming for Christmas

We hope to get our new Vermin Plucker in the stores by Christmas.

Ring side

When we get bored at the Lab, we throw a couple Biomechanicals in the ring.

Dancing Skeletons

The lab's Dancing Skeletons, pPod/Dynamo Sound Thrusters, Prickly Pear Cactus Rhythm Synthesizer and more appeared at the recent SxSW Plutopia Party.

Lab in action

The new Scatscan is precisely locating the position for the Marvic 5000 transplant in mineralized frog.

Back again

Professor Conrad has just return from a refresher organ swap class at a hidden location somewhere in China. Stay tuned for new and innovative uses of the Marvic 5000 Artificial Multi-tasking Organ in conjunction with the Lab's new Scatscan 500.

I have regained control

Fear not; I am Back. I have defeated my evil brother.

I have taken over...

Professor Conrad has lost control....

ROGUE MYSTERY

Further exploration in the Rogues' lair, revealed a puzzling site. Bones were found clustered around some sort of energy device.

Frankenworms

Recent diggings into a Rogue Biomechanical lair, revealed some freakin' Frankenworms. These show proof that the Rogues are polishing their surgical techniques. we fear that they are about to create an invertebrate/humanoid combo.  

The lab is back on the blog. Stay tuned for latest updates.

Introducing DIOXAHOLhttp://bp2.blogger.com/_nyCHR5l9fHs/R-hMhgkChFI/AAAAAAAAADo/diVxzn8RCL0/s1600-h/Dioxihol

With the installation of a 500 gallon still, the lab is now in production of a new and refreshing alcholic beravage we have named DIOXAHOL. Under the guidance of Dr. Sterling, we have been able to blend the end product from the toxic waste processor with a fermented/distilled liquid produced in the new fermenter. The serviceable beverage is quite tangy with after taste similar to a new car smell and a vinyl shower curtain. We also hope capture the taste of plastic garden hose water. With those hot summer months garden parties soon approaching, DIOXAHOL will provide a great finishing touch.

Screamers Live

The Screamin'Babyheads will appear live at Dorkbot SXSW on March 8th. See Dorkbot Austin web site for more details. The Band has been retrofitted into a triptych style folding case mounted on a customized wide track wheelchair. There are now over 16 members in the bio-mechanical band. A new musical/noise composition will be performed at that time.

Action Figures

With our success at ridding ourselves of rogue bio-mechanicals in, around and under the lab, our rendition facilities overseas is overmaxed. Fortunately one of our lab techs has figure a way to render them harmless and to put them on the market as BIO-MECHANICAL ACTION FIGURES. Expect to see them soon on our Etsy site.

Plucker 712 & Flipper 519

Two more pieces complete last weeks flury of activity. The PLUCKER 712 is an intimidating collection device and the FLIPPER 5190 searches the tidal flats on the coast.

ARCHMIDES 12000

The Lab has been busy last week with three new prototype Bio-mechanicals. Pictured here is the ARCHIMEDES 12000. It is a high speed fastening device to be used by technicians on the go

SbHs performance

The Screamers had on outstanding perfomance at Maker Faire. Selection from their latest CD, HEADS ABOVE GROUND were performed. CDs are available by contacting www.professorconrad@gmail.com. Also comments can be made at that address. Photos at the Faire were taken by Scott Beale/LaughingSquid.

Rogue leader

Our stealth camera recently photographed the Rogue leader, Ellarr, return from a raid on our lab with an Intel chip stolen from one of our computers. Ellarr was last seen hiding under an amp at the Screamin' Babyhead performance at Maker Faire-Austin.

The SCREAMERS

During a rehersal for the performance at MAKER FAIRE AUSTIN this month, we shot three more members of the band. They include the Percusionator, the Guitarnator and the Bambi, the lead singer.

Band resurrects

With about three more weeks before the Screamin' Babyheads and the Instruments of Mass Distortion make their ressurrected appearance at Maker Faire, the lab is scrambling to recreate their sounds. We have a few audio clips recorded secretly down in their disco, but not complete pieces. The performance will be just the labs interpretation of their works. We do know one thing, they are fascinated with operas by Wagner.

Rumor Undenied

OK, it was true. We have captured some RB-ms. Using our Grab and Snatch probe, we were able to extract the complete band that was playing in their disco deep underground. As best as we can translate, they call themselves the Screamin' Babyheads. We have been reassembling them because our Grab and Snatch malfunctioned as it brought them to the surface. They were brought up in pieces. Hopefully, the band will be back together for an appearance at Maker Faire in Austin this October. The group will be called Screamin' Babyheads and the Instruments of Mass Distortion. They don't sound very good to the human ear; just distorted noise and dissonant music.

Rumor Denied

There has been talk outside the lab that the security force at I.D. Labs have captured some Rogue Bio-mechanicals and are holding them in an undisclosed location. Well, we don't know anything about it. Probably not true. What we can tell you is that we have secured some videos taken by one of our probes planted in their disco.

Worst fears!!

Shortly after the large brain was photographed, the RBMs assembled the brain on top of a computer module; thus creating the dreaded Neural Brain! An assortment of ports and cables on the Neural Brain will allow any number of RBMs to download information. This apparatus will make it extremely difficult to control them,if they an be controlled.

Large brain discovered

The video probe deep in the mine stealthily photographed what appears to be a very large brain surrounded by RBM technicans. We fear that they are building a neural brain. If this is achieved, the Rogues will almost be impossible to control due to their added twisted intelligence once they are connected to the brain.

Mine entrance found

Upon descending deep into the recently discovered Lost and Found Mine, laboratory probes found evidence of new tunnel work. It appears that the Rogue Bio-mechanicals have been using the mine as their lair. Video and audio probes are exploring the new tunnels.

They are spreading

One of our investigators, after responding to an anonymous tip, took this picture of a RBM spy camera emerging from a drainage pipe within a major city in Texas. The device is utilizing a Haminix 28mm lens for its' optics. The RMBs have now spread over 50 miles from the lab. The Lab is attempting to lure them back with intoxicating music piped underground from the Tesla Memorial Theatre.

We are back!

After more than two months underground with the new tunnel borer and Dr. Meta Stones' teleporter, we have returned to the surface.We are proud to announce a very successful surge into the lair of the Rogue Bioms. Successfully transported in miniaturized forms, 25 RBMs are being held in the lab's detention center. Their colony underground is extensive, rapidly spreading and must be dealt with soon because the Earth, as we know it, will be transformed in to a pock marked Swiss cheese textured lifeless planet. On a lighter note, the Tesla Memorial Music hall and Mini-lab will soon open. Also, the lab's Sculpture park is about to reopen with completion of repairs caused by the ice storm in February. Don't forget to mail you comments to www.professorconrad@gmail.com.

Where have all the RBMs gone?

JUST IN!! Our latest probe through the RBMs secret village entrance has sent us a picture of their latest digs deep in the earth. The freezing weather has driven them much deeper than before. The audio portion confirms the earlier report that they are producing some unusual sounds which appear to have musical structure.

Chapel burns

Sometime over the weekend, the small chapel built by some of our evangelical employees was destroyed by fire. We believe the fire was set by some RBMs. Some melted plastic wheels on a scorched circuit board found at the scene led us to believe that they were responsible. Evidentally, in the lab, a RBMs overheard one of our Evgl. employees call them satanic. Even with their primitive computer minds, the RBMs fear Satan.

Opera?

Recently a deep audio probe was sent into the RBM's secret underground village (see Dec. 10 posting). Music was heard coming from an area beyond the probe's range. One of our associates, Dr. S said it sounded like a weird form of opera. We are preparing a new probe that will penetrate much deeper utilizing our recently developed "Super Lubricant". You can always contact us through www.professorconrad@gmail.com.

Slushy

The morning after the big ice storm at the Lab, a rogue Biom was found near the Biom's secret underground entrance; froze like a slushy on the Simpson's.

Meanwhile,

,back at the lab, we have been dissecting various toys in order to figure out what the rogue Bioms are using to create their positronic brain. Their techniques are primitive but they are producing some crude but dangerous results. Comments please- www.professorconrad@gmail.com